I’m a Christian and I Hate Gays

angry man

Actually, I don’t hate gays. At least I didn’t think so.

Until I watched the news.

They told me that I really do hate gays after all. If you follow the news at all you might have seen that gay marriage bans have been upheld in four states.

Before the decision people took to the streets with signs and banners and flooded social media with the slogan “No H8” (no hate)

no H8

It seems that I hate because I differ in my ideas. I hate because I’m trying to “legislate morality.”

Here’s the kicker, though – we ALL try to legislate morality. All legislature is based on someone’s morality. The real question comes down to, “Whose morality is going to rule the day?”

I prefer mine. You prefer yours. It doesn’t mean I hate those who differ any more than those who differ hate me. Are we not allowed to disagree and seek to pursue our morality and to govern according to it without name calling and denigration? One of the wonders of a democratic republic is that we as citizens have a voice in determining the kind of country we want. You want yours. I want mine. So we peacefully work to bring it about. That doesn’t make me a hater.

As a Christian I will vote for the measures and ideas I believe align with my morality and values. I would expect the same from liberal Christians and non-Christians. We cannot label opposition as hate. When the time comes that America moves completely away from my morality and values (and I have no doubt that day will come) I won’t accuse you of hate just because you voted contrary to my beliefs. That’s what being in a democratic republic is all about.

For you readers who are conservative Christians, some of you need to simmer down. It’s okay to vote your beliefs without becoming angry and mean towards those who disagree. Jesus always loved on people who were “sinners.” He called people to change and to live new lives, but he was never rude or hateful towards them.

For you more liberal types, please stop labeling us as haters when we vote our consciences.

We can love and act in loving ways while still seeking to legislate our values. Disagreement does NOT = hate.

And in case you didn’t really hear me – I don’t hate gays.

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I welcome all discussion, just keep it civil and polite. If this post resonates with you in any way, please share it on Facebook, Twitter, or email!

Related Posts:
A Christian Response to Gay Marriage
Forced Gay: Punishment for Religious Dissent?
Forced Gay: Part Two

A Christian Response to Gay Marriage

horrified-faceToday I was contacted by a woman who had some pretty heavy questions regarding the LGBT lifestyle (unless you have your head stuck in the sand or are stuck at home raising multiple children you will know about the Supreme Court’s decisions today…). She had a question about an appropriate response and felt like and “outsider” because she didn’t feel contempt for the gay community or have a strong desire to convert them to heterosexuals. The following is the letter I wrote her back. I understand that you may differ in your take, but this is coming through my lenses on how I see the world and how I read the Bible – which I believe should set the standard for actions and belief.

From my reading the Bible is pretty clear that God’s design is that sex be restricted to one man and one woman who are married to each other. Do people break God’s design? ALL THE TIME! You are right that God’s design is also for marriage to be a life-long commitment without divorce, yet that happens as well. We live in a broken world in which people act in broken ways.

In that sense we’re all messed up, loved by a gracious God in spite of ourselves. There are probably several reasons why the church focuses so much intensity and anger towards the LGBT community, but that is our error. We are called to love people no matter what their personal sin is. Some drink to excess – yet the Bible says that drunkenness is a sin. We love them still. The Bible says not to divorce, but Christians do. We love them still.

I believe that God designed male and female to be compatible. Same-sex sexuality goes against the natural order. But let’s differentiate between sexual behavior and sexual inclination/attraction. I do know people who have same-sex attraction as a result of life circumstances (bad parenting situation, sexual abuse, etc.). There is also a cultural push to see same-sex friendships as gay because we are uncomfortable with the idea of a deep friendship between two men. I have heard some people interpreting the intimate friendship between David and Jonathan in the Bible as being a homosexual relation. While they were closer than brothers there is no indication that they were gay. But we are often uncomfortable with same-sex intimacy. How can you experience intimacy with someone of the same sex unless it is sexual? This is more of a Western point of view than an Eastern one. My wife, who has a degree in missions and has traveled quite a bit in southeast Asia, tells me that it’s not uncommon in foreign countries to see two men walking down the street holding hands as a sign of camaraderie and intimacy, even though they are both happily married to women.

Even still, some people claim same-sex attraction with no childhood trauma. I am not a scientist, so I will not deny that it may be possible that there is a same-sex attraction born in some people. To my understanding this has not been proven. But even if it were proven, I believe that God’s Word remains unchanged about same-sex behavior and that God loves them no matter what (if our behavior determined God’s love we’d ALL be in trouble).

To the person who claims attraction I would differentiate between attraction and sexual activity. Some see this as a cop out, but I believe it to be a valid way of maintaining a sense of truth to oneself and to God’s design. Just because you might find yourself attracted to the same sex does not mean you have to act upon it. Humanity has a marvelous capacity to exercise self-control if we want to – sadly, much of our society laughs at the idea of self-control (and not just in regards to our sexuality, but to every other area of life).

At the end of the day you are right that God calls us to love and embrace all people regardless of their choices. People go against God’s design all the time – we love them anyway. Ultimately God is judge and we are not. As a pastor I will tell people what I believe God’s design is. It’s up to them and God as to whether or not they act on it. I still love them no matter what they choose.

And I do believe that, at the end of time, there will be people in heaven that will surprise us – and people in hell that we never expected to be there!

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I welcome all discussion, just keep it civil and polite. If this post resonates with you in any way, please share it on Facebook, Twitter, or email!

Related Posts:
Forced Gay: Punishment for Religious Dissent?
Forced Gay: Part Two

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To my readers, please feel free to engage in discussion, but we will do so with decency and kindness, even when we disagree with each other.